Talking Head: Don’t Believe Everything You Think

I used to live in a densely populated neighborhood in one of the biggest cities in the country. I had the front half of a duplex, so my nearest neighbor lived just the other side of a couple of slabs of wallboard in my bedroom. I heard everything he did and said in that room, even though I didn’t really have any personal interest in experiencing his love life second hand. I didn’t really mind, though. I had grown used to the constant, low-level white noise that comes with all the cool stuff urban life brings, like Thai takeout at midnight.

Then one day I took up meditation and I discovered that the noise outside paled to insignificance in the face of the avalanche of sound inside my own head. Sitting in a meditative pose was hard enough (I hate when my legs go to sleep), but waiting for my brain to stop babbling at me was exquisite torture. If my legs hadn’t been asleep, I probably would have run screaming from the non-stop scripts running over and over. I tried guided imagery (somebody else’s script), chanting (nonsense syllables since I had no idea what they meant), and toughing it out. Nothing worked.

Then one day, it occurred to me that maybe that was the point. Meditation isn’t necessarily about stilling the stream of mental babble, though I suppose the masters of Zen may succeed in doing so. The point for we ordinary mortals is that it allows us to become aware of our scripts and just how banal, annoying and downright idiotic they are.

My meditative sessions became far more satisfying after I had that particular revelation. Instead of fighting to ignore my scripts, I started paying particular attention to them, and it was a very enlightening experience (no pun intended). I discovered that some of my personal problems (okay, most of them) could be traced back to the nifty little wordplays racing around my noggin. People complain about the constant bombardment of advertising and disinformation by the Media. Bah, they are amateurs. My brain will take them two falls out of three any day.

I found this insight both surprising and disturbing. I’m skeptical by nature, so I rarely take anything at face value. But I had been steeping in a mélange of self-defeating, disempowering goo on endless replay most of my life. I’d been suckering myself without even realizing it. But how do you change those scripts?

Not easily, I discovered. It’s been a constant struggle, and an evolving adventure that is far from over. Most days, I have a pretty positive perspective on my life. Some days, not so much. The best part is that the journey is turning out to be the point of it all as I explore my inner landscape and renovate my interior monologue using the tools I’ve picked up along the way.

My biggest revelation: nobody can do it for you. Redecorating your mental house is definitely a do-it-yourself project. There are mentors and experts to consult along the way, but I’ve discovered it’s all about you.

Grab that measuring tape and dream something good. Just Think Differently.

Free Your Mind and Free the World

I am a slave. I bind myself with the chains of my own limited perspective.

I am not alone, accompanied by millions of other souls who live without questioning the validity of living in a box. This is not to suggest that I’m happy here. I wail and bitch and moan about it, commiserate with other sufferers as we nod our heads sagely about the unfairness of it all. We argue for our right to freedom, holding it up as a sparkling treasure just beyond our reach. Exclaiming that we would do such wonderful things were we able to break our chains, we indulge in fantasies of fame, wealth, health, and success. We fail to achieve these things because our merciless captors hold us back. It is no fault of our own. No, of course not. Pity.

Trouble is, I’ve turned and looked for that jailer only to find that she bears a remarkable resemblance to me. And is that a key I see on the table in front of me? All I must do is pick it up, turn it in the lock and the door will swing open. Stretching before me is the marvelous vista of all the possibilities I could pursue. It’s not that I’m not willing to go for it. In fact, it’s a tremendous surprise that I missed seeing it in the first place.

What is this key, anyway? How did I miss it?

I could give a hundred reasons and they would sound like a mix of blame and denial. There are plenty of pop-psychologists with unflattering opinions and religious zealots out there ready to beat us for our “sins.” I prefer to take a kinder, gentler road. That was then, this is now. Then I didn’t see it, now I do. My door is open and I’m moving on. Let go of the past, baby. The only thing you have to work with is today. Yesterday is out of reach and fading fast.

When things are looking grim, open your eyes and your mind. Take notice of that shiny thing sitting in front of you. Pick it up and look it over. Then ask yourself the kindest thing you can about the corner you’ve painted for yourself: is it real? Is there another way to look at this thing? How bad could it be to get a little paint on your shoe on the way to your goal?

Take some steps. Just Think Differently.

Just Think Differently

Just Think Differently. A simple statement, but not so simple to achieve. It’s not so much a mindset as a daily practice to keep the mind flexible and open while swimming in the warm, entropic waters of daily life.

What am I talking about? It’s an idea that’s been kicking around my head for some time. It reflects my own efforts to counteract my knee-jerk responses to life’s ephemeral demons (most of my own making). It’s the warning sign that reminds me to stop and reconsider my first reactions to those three-in-the-morning noises that go bump in the night, when everyone is most vulnerable. Oh yeah, you know what I’m talking about. Everything is SO much worse at 3:00 a.m.

Come 7:00 a.m. and the light of a new morning, and you find yourself wondering, “WTF?” The bogeys dissolve in sunlight and insoluble problems become minor action items on a day’s agenda. Or maybe not, and the little devils follow you through the day, skirting around the periphery and sucking the joy and color out of your life.

I’m going to explore the ways in which I’ve turned the high beams on those life-leeching, negative, self-nullifying ideas and thoughts. It’s such fun to feel like absolute, low-down, hopeless dog-stuff on my shoe and suddenly discover my inner joy and power again as I dance round the bonfire I’ve made of my personal demons.

The source of ignition? It should be obvious since it’s well within reach all the time. Perhaps it’s hard to see because we stand too close to the bark to see the inspirational acorn hanging overhead, ready to fall. More likely, it’s a case of inertia crushing the motive force that could set us free. It seems to take a massive force of will to get going, but when we do, we can’t imagine standing still. The force? Oh yeah. It’s simple, really. Just Think Differently.